[Me, on my deathbed]

St. Peter: "Step into the light, child."

Me: Wait! I forgot my phone charger!!!


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A moment of sympathy for all the commitment-phobic gay men and women who now have to come up with a new excuse for why they can't marry you.


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[TWEET] All the King's Horses...

One of my favorite tweets of all time:

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[Drinking with Jesus on the stoop when a cop approaches]

Cop: "What's in the cups, boys?"

Jesus: "Just water, officer."

[Jesus lifts sunglasses and winks at camera]


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The Archetype of the Gay Villain

This is a great bit from James Adomian (@JAdomian). It changed how I look at villains in a lot of TV and movies:

http://youtu.be/KFyo9b4_6iY

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The Federation's Flagship Bed

Are we to believe that the captain of The Federation's flagship vessel doesn't even rate a king-sized bed? Not even a queen? What is that anyway? It doesn't even look like a full-size bed! Fuck you, Star Trek.


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How to Bring Back the Dinosaurs

 

Tango's Tumblr

Hat tip to @DrScienceCat

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Hometown Hits the Big Time

For those of you not from Mississippi or the region, the question is "What is Hattiesburg?" My hometown, and USM is where I went to school. Surprisingly, a contestant got it right. Way to go Kevin.


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The Humpiest Day of the Year

Today is Wednesday, June 17, 2015.

Today is the hump day of the week, in the hump week of the month, in the hump month of the year, in the hump year of the decade.

What I'm saying is that after today, we can just coast until 2020. Those emails can wait, people... until Monday, January 6th 2020.

Things won't be this good again until June 15th, 2050.


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[LINK] 6 Batshit Crazy Ways Superman Tried to Protect His Identity

Seanbaby has been quiet lately. I suppose he's been busy with Calculords, which is the best mobile game on the market if you ask me. The wait is over, though! His newest for Cracked is a good one:

6 Batshit Crazy Ways Superman Tried to Protect His Identity

"I hope I've demonstrated during this article that Superman scripts are filled with more dark insanity than the dream journals of Josh Duggar's sisters, so it's no small thing when I say this Pat Boone comic is the batshit-craziest Superman story of all time."

"The stakes in Superman stories are so low you'd swear you were reading Gwyneth Paltrow's blog."

Lots of other great lines in this article. Seanbaby still delivers. 

Last night I was talking with someone who mentioned several times that her co-workers are "full of Pinot," which I thought was a clever way of saying that they're drunkards. I was mistaken. She was actually saying that they are Filipino; I was just hearing her wrong.

Heh. I'm going to get a lot of mileage out of that played upon set of words.


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A Quick Guide to My Headspace at Any Given Moment

[LINK] The Sky is the Limit

This Tumblr is great: sadanimalfacts.com

As the name implies, it is full of sad animal facts illustrated with cute drawings. 

Red Hot Chilly Peppers? Make up your minds guys. Are you hot or cold?


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Someone called me a rapscallion today. What is that? Some kind of hip hop onion?


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[MUSIC] Saint-Saens "Aquarium"

I've noticed this piece showing up in more and more TV shows over the last decade. I don't know, maybe it has always been popular on soundtracks and I'm only noticing it now. It first caught my attention in the Simpsons episode, "The Wife Aquatic" and it's been popping up ever since. It's a pretty piece, so I'm not complaining.

[LINK] Super Metroid Music

This is really only a note to myself, but it may be of interest to others. Metroid Database is a website dedicated to, you guessed it, the Metroid series. My personal favorite is Super Metroid for the SNES. It ranks up there in my top five games of all time.

Anyway, I wanted to hear the music from the Maridia region of the game which led me to the Metroid Database where I found rips of the soundtrack. If anybody else is interested, it can be found here:

http://www.metroid-database.com/sm/music.php